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Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Day 9: Someone You Didn't Want to Let Go, but Drifted From

I grew up around a common group of kids my age.  We all went to the same church and most of us eventually ended up attending the school that the church ran.  It was assumed that these people would be my friends.  My parents, for sure, assumed this and encouraged me to hang out with the "church kids" over other friends I met in school, even though the church kids were the ones I most often had problems with.  I wasn't cut out with the same cookie cutter as they were, maybe not even the same kind of dough.

I had fleeting friendships with many of them and we are civil and moderately interested, for whatever reason, in each other's lives when we see each other.  My lack of closeness with this particular group was a major factor in my choosing to go away to college and to stay away after I graduated.

My move to Ohio affected the few close friendships that I did manage to have throughout high school.  My best friend and I hardly ever talk.  We are both busy working multiple jobs to make ends meet, but when we do see each other, we catch up quickly and pick up right where we left off.  I would still say that we have drifted.  I'd have to say it started around my senior year of high school.  When I got a late night phone call from her, she didn't even have to tell me that she was pregnant, I already knew.  We were that close.  New moms get busy though and she went through a lot of drama with her family during her pregnancy, so we didn't see each other or talk as much as we used to.

I left that next summer.  I spent eight to nine months of the next four years out of state.  Classes and homework took up less time than they should've, but time is still time.  I met new friends, went to new parties, had more constant rehearsal schedules.  I made it back to visit when I could and she was one of a small number of people who warranted a visit nearly every time.  I was a bridesmaid in her wedding my sophomore year, but had to miss her shower because I couldn't afford another trip back East.

I miss her a lot.  Nothing's come between us, we've just drifted.  Adulthood demands more of us both and we're in different places now than we'd imagined during our high school sleepovers.

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