If I write this post, I may cry at work. I've been crying less and less everyday since The Writer left for NYC. I'm embarrassed that I've been so emotional, but the schedule of his departure and other things left me a wreck. We spend a lot of amazing time together last week...oh shoot, here come the tears again.
I miss my nook--that place just inside his shoulder that my head fits into when we cuddle. I miss his smell. I miss having someone to talk to during meals, car rides, and shopping trips. I miss the way he'd hold me. I miss feeling my bed sag in his direction and the way he'd pull me close to him right as we were waking up. I miss the eye-rolls when I start yet another episode of Sex and the City. I miss the random interruptions to our conversations when I fancy car goes by.
I'm buying my plane ticket next week, as long as all goes well. Then the official countdown to reunion can begin. Four-and-a-half weeks seems like a really long time, but it will mean that his internship is halfway over, we'll be together again in an exciting new city, and I won't have to be jealous that he can go to H&M and TopShop whenever he wants. Until then, I suppose, I should relish having the covers to myself and...other things I like to do alone?
It's been hard getting into solo activities, because so many places around here hold memories of us. Not that I don't want to think about him, but doing things alone that we used to do together while I'm still feeling ridiculously lonely only reminds me that I'm alone and that I miss him....and I hate crying, especially in public.